Ever notice how it's the little things in life that amuse us so much? More to the point, ever notice how it's the silly little idiocies in life that amuse us more than anything else? Well, this is not as much ''the little blog that could'' as it is ''the blog that enjoys going up the down escalator in your local mall.'' Will it have anything of real importance? No, probably not. But enjoy the ride never the less!

 


Mel and I spent a few days this past week relaxing in the company of Kevin, Donna and Gabezilla. Movies were watched. Pleasant conversations were had. Silly and strange online videos were watched. And I spent most of my time trying to teach Gabe the difference between "no pants" and "nothing at all."

You see, it appears that Gabe has interpreted my "no pants" philosophy to mean: nothing should be girding one's loins at all. So you can imagine my surprise and bemusement as Gabe toddled over to me, a big grin on his face, and proceeded to remove his diaper. Repeatedly. No matter how often I tried explaining to him (while putting his diaper back on) that diapers are not pants, and especially in his case, the diapers need to stay on, Gabe disagreed.

Gabe then astounded (and soiled) us by somehow removing his diaper and leaving the sleeper pyjamas over them perfectly intact. I have absolutely no idea how the little Houdini pulled this stunt off, but there wasn't even a clasp undone. He'd managed to yank off his diaper without disturbing anything else he was wearing overtop. Mel clued in to this little fact when Gabe ran over, hugged her, and Mel realized she was suddenly a little damper than she'd been a few moments prior.

And what did I, her loving husband, do? Well...actually, I laughed at her predicament.

Then she threw a shoe at me.

It hurt.

In the meantime, I've spent the last few days trying to recover from a cold that's managed to knock me flat on my perky little ass. (Those cynics reading this can feel free to substitute "non-existant" for "perky". I know you'd do it anyways even without my permission.)

I pride myself on having a better-than-average immune system, so whenever I succumb to my annual cold, it means either my immune system chose the wrong bloody time to go on strike, or else that the virus was that nasty. Given my state the last couple of days, despite the recent influx of cold medicine after I realized I couldn't beat this bug on my own, I'd have to say the virus is that nasty.

That's not to say I'm a plague monkey or anything. I'm not that contagious or ill. Yet. At least I hope I've not become a plague monkey. Although that sounds like a great name for a drink.

Bartender: "If you want, you can try the Black Monkey or the Plague Monkey."

Hapless Customer: "What's the difference between them?"

Bartender: "Oh, about three shots of tequilla."


And because I have nothing else witty to write about in this little bit of nowhere, here's Today's Lesson: "no pants" does not mean "no diapers".
posted by Phillip at 8:14 AM